Saturday, January 09, 2010

Perish the Thought

Michael Steel
Chairman, Republican National Committee

Although Michael Steel is the Republican National Committee Chairman, the question still must be asked: What the hell is he doing acting like he's the head of the Republican Party?

First off, he's a black guy, right? But it seems that didn't stop him from writing a book. Seriously - the man wrote a book. And it's all about his plans to defeat the OTHER now semi-famous Black guy who, incredibly, is under the delusion that he's actually running America as President! What is with these black guys?

Because Michael Steele is under the impression that he, not Rush Limbaugh or Dick Cheney, is actually running the Republican Party. His book even outlines a Twelve-Step agenda for defeating his party's political political opposition. (Does anyone else find that a nationwide Republican Twelve-Step program is just so apropos?)

Unfortunately, Steele's "aides" - that's right, the people who ASSIST him, are pissed. They've been "blindsided" by this book and are quite certain that it should have been vetted by at least a junior aide, maybe even a senior one. Someone who is well...white and Republican at the very least.

Furthermore, they take Steele to account for his seemingly ulterior motives in writing the book and making speeches (like Cheney, Bush Jr., Bush Sr., Laura, Barbara, Cheney's gay daughter, Guiliani and any other Republican who just will not realize they're not or never were in office.) Michael Steele, according to his party, is all about the bling and the glam. His book is just a bid to "profit personally" and couldn't possibly have anything to do with setting goals and bringing his party back to the winning side of the game (perish the thought...seriously...kill that thought OK?)

Because it's all a game. And Michael Steele is definitively one of the black pawns. He better recognize, son. You can't just raise up and be the head of the Republican National Committee, just because they made you...well...head of the Republican National Committee. That's just crazy talk.


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